Everyone Is Writing Letters

It appears in this grand place known as Bloggy World, letter-writing is the new "thing."

For a while, it looked like give-aways were taking over Blog Land, but that craze seems to be waning. The thing now seems to be to write. Write to whomever we have an issue. This could be our spouses, our bosses, our higher power, our political leaders, our teachers, our coaches, our merchants, or even our fairy godmothers. My favorite part of all these blog letters is when people emphasize a point by typing. like. this. That's when you know it's serious business.

So, to whom will I be writing today? My phone. That's right. The phone at work, so here we go:

Dear Work Phone,

You are brand new here and I want you to know how much you were wanted and wished for.

There's just one thing... you ring too much!

Really, phone, you've got to stop. Your predecessor was old. In phone years, he was probably 137, so he didn't have all your bling. No mute, no redial, no fancy voice mail system, no paging capabilities, and (gasp!), no Caller ID. I wish you knew how much we longed for Caller ID. In fact, we were paying for it all along, but couldn't utilize it.

But now, well, now it's almost a curse. That's right. I see that 770 number and know beyond a shadow of a doubt that our Las Vegas rep is calling, and, by picking up the line, I will be trapped on the phone for at least 15 minutes of my actual life. And this 15 minutes will be spent listening to another old coot spout his theories of life and how things should be.

770 is just one of my fears. There's 859 (yep - Kentucky), the whiney baby, and 615 (Nashville), the slow-talker. Don't forget 727 (Florida), the begger, 504 (New Orleans) who, while extremely nice, rambles, and 832 (Houston), the cusser (funny, but a cusser nonetheless).

Phone, your manual doesn't tell me how to make MY calls go straight to voice mail. You two should communicate because I know you know how to do this. Couldn't you leave me a message with detailed instructions?

Please do me a favor and keep those area codes in a special queue and when you see them coming in, send them straight. to. the. colonel.

Welcome aboard, phone. Hope you make it to 137, too!

Sincerely,

Lynda